The first few days after chemo

Get the substances working

1.     Keep in mind: Good to know the first round has been administered! Now the little warriors are fighting their way through your body. Whenever they come across a cancer cell: Front kick in the face. Domo arrigato!

2.     You feel sick when you wake up? Feel pleased, because the side effect is quite a valid proof of the effects. Hurray! Bugger off you bastard cancer cells! Hasta la non vista, fare ye not very well, au re jamais voir, auf nimmer Wiedersehen. Get up, switch on all the lights that you want to, take your anti-sickness tablet, nibble on a dry piece of bread, turn on your bestest music and – dance! If you feel weak, dance very slowly, or sit and move your upper body to the rhythm. Put on a big, fat smile! Your brain can be cheated into good mood this way.

3.     Is there anything that you would love to do, like going to IKEA, or the local Star Coffee or Costa Bucks? Good idea! Too tired to leave the sofa? Ask friends/ family/neighbours, the milkman or postperson to give you a lift/to accompany you/to fetch something for you. If you can only sit on one of the sofas in the IKEA exhibition, just sit and enjoy the bubbling life around you. Or hang out on one of the chairs or sofas in the restaurant. If they are occupied, be candid, but be friendly as well. If you cannot drink anything in the coffee shop, tell the staff in a nice way why you need to spend some time there without consuming. Or ask the people who accompany you to drink more, for your sake.

4.     Accept other people’s offers. They want to be kind. Because as they cannot change the essence of the situation, it is important for them to do SOMETHING. It reinstates their power, which is quite important, because otherwise they will feel helpless, and then: angry. For them doing something for you means they are useful. Allow them to be useful. If they can bake well and offer you to bake for you whatever you want to have – accept! And accept with a happy heart and a big “thank you”!

5.     Buy the latest season of your favourite TV show that you have wanted ever since it came out, but were too sensible and sober-minded to buy because it will cost a third AFTER christmas. So what!? Have it! To be honest, you are going through more than a scratch on the bum at the moment. Indulge! Endless hours of watching or sleeping in front of the telly, and nobody dares to tell you it is not good for you. And the remote control is all yours, too. Even if you sleep most of the time, nobody in their right mind will disturb you, or change the programme. Now is the time to take revenge on your kids for all the rows over the TV magazine. Keep it under control, tell them a day LATE what TV show they have missed. No. Only joking. Don’t take revenge on your children. Take revenge on your children AND your husband. 😉

6.     Seriously, don’t drink and don’t smoke. Ever thought that Don Quixote looks pathetic when he fights windmills on his decrepit horse? It looks even more pathetic to see people with their chemo drips outside hospital entrances with a fag on their lips. And to be honest, I think that during chemo your liver has enough to deal with WITHOUT booze.

7.  to 10. I have no idea. You might want to send tips.

Yours, gratefully,

Maid Manu.

1 Comment

  1. My dear, u forgot the important game sea war 🙂 let the cancer go down,down,down…..

    yours… forever

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